| |
 |
Ask Dr Hemp
Past archives January 2002
(part 1).
Scroll down the page to read past questions sent to our
pot expert, Dr Hemp. Remember if you have a hemp or drugs related question
- you can e-mail Dr Hemp at [email protected].
Also, for love and sex advice you can ask the Caned In
Totnes sex agony aunt - Dr Hump. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I could use a
few pointers to pass a piss test in two days. Anything will do man like last
minute things would be great. I need something real and I can't use those
drinks as they check for them. Thanks man anything will do.
Regards,
Lucky. |
Dear
Lucky,
I don't quite understand
why you can't use a detox drink? All these drinks do is temporarily cleanse
your system out to hide any drugs such as THC that may be in your system. There
is no way they can tell if you have used one of these drinks, they are probably
only saying this, as they don't want people to use them as they know these
products do work.
They can get suspicious if the pee is very clear,
although they still cannot prove anything if it does not test positive, but
they can ask you to do the test again. To avoid this, take a vitamin B12
supplement to keep the yellow colour in your urine. Remember it is up to them
to prove that you have taken drugs and not for you to prove that you have not.
They do use scare tactics and some people fall for them too often.
As
for drink products, some work better than others. I do not recommend drink
products unless it is absolutely necessary. Here are the three most common
myths on drink products:
- Drink products rid the toxins from your system. Only
time itself will remove toxins from your system. Drink products will only help
minimize the toxin levels in urine.
- The drink products must work because they offer money
back guarantees. The guarantees that are used by many manufactures are the most
dubious aspect of these products. To take advantage the double money back
guarantees you need to provide a copy of your dissatisfied results. They do not
tell you, getting a copy is nearly impossible because the company that paid for
the test will tell you that you are not entitled to your results. Yes, you may
be able to get your results but you usually have to spend lots of time and
energy in doing so. Usually, people have more important things to invest their
energy, like trying to find a way to keep their job or thinking of a way to
find a new job. Suddenly, 30 dollars looks very unimportant when you are out of
a job.
- It is not the products that do the trick; it is the
large amount of water that you drink does the most good. One thing that is
common to all these products is that they require you to drink lots of water.
I've seen these products come in capsule form, tablet form or drink form.
Another thing they will all say is, drink lots of water. In essence, it is the
water that does the trick and not the magical product. This is the real deal in
regards to the drink products.
If they watch you take the piss test and you need to
use a drink product then I recommend a company called
Test Clear who have some
excellent cleansing drinks that do work.
For privacy reasons, they
generally don't watch you pee when you do the test, unless it is for the Forces
or probation services. So if they don't actually watch you take the test then
all you will need for a negative test result is some 'Instant Powdered Urine',
which again you can buy from Test Clear.
This product comes complete in a kit that
includes an air activated heater that takes about 15 minutes to get at the
right temp and will last between 4 to 5 hours.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
 |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
We were just
looking for pictures for our desktop, and then we saw your site, also we
decided to go into the Dr Hemp site cuz we liked the picture of him. We thought
it would be a cool tattoo. Well anyway, my friend was wondering if there were
any side effects, dangerous or not to taking claritin and smoking pot?
Thanks for the help man,
Sean.
P.S. I attached a picture
I drew blowed.
 |
Dear
Sean,
Glad you like the
site, but sorry to disappoint as that is not actually a picture of me; I don't
even have a beard. However, I like it too.
One of the good things about
cannabis is it generally doesn't effect other medications. The pollen count
here in Totnes is also very high and tends to make people cough rather than
sneeze. If you want to know further details about Claritin then try this web
site www.claritin-information.net as I am only a doctor of
smoking cannabis and unable to offer sound medical
advice.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp.
P.S. Thanks for the picture of the man speaker dog thingy. Maybe
mixing cannabis with Claritin isn't such good idea after all. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Lately I've
been thinking about growing my own plants, but I've been having a little
trouble trying to decide what kind of light to use. I know that HPS is the best
choice, but I'd rather use fluorescent if possible (start-up costs seem like
they'd be a lot more manageable). If I used a fixture that held 4 48" tubes,
would that produce enough light for a garden that's about 3'x4'? Using 2
warm-white and 2 cool-white bulbs should give me the spectrum that I need,
shouldn't it?
After all, light is light, isn't
it?
Regards,
Skiz. |
Dear
Skiz,
We here in Totnes find that
the best light to use in any situation is your inner light!
Alternatively, check out
www.starlitesystems.co.uk who will be able to help you out
with all your indoor lighting needs.
Take some time off to read my past
answers, as you'll find plenty of tips on cannabis growing. I also recommend
getting a good book. I'm in the process of writing one, but in the mean time
have a look at the bibliography on this web site.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I want to know
what is the most potent weed on earth. I have heard good things about G13 X
Hash and Jack Herer from Sensi Seeds. Some help would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
Greg. |
Dear
Greg,
Who can say what is the
most potent grass on the planet? People are producing better seed strains all
the time. Sensi Seeds are good, but also very expensive, which is why I've
stopped using them.
G-13 is a very good strain, but only in the hands
of a good grower. It takes practice, perseverance and perhaps a little pot luck
to achieve the best results. Other good strains include Cyber Crystal, Ice,
Northern Light, Haze, Misty and many many more.
If you are growing
quality F1 strains of marijuana such as G-13 then I should not complain if you
sent me some. In fact it doesn't even have to be G-13, everything counts and we
can always send the really crap stuff to Torquay where it belongs.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I am about to
grow some weed and I was wondering how often I should water it and how long
after I plant it until I can smoke it?
Thanks,
Ron. |
Dear
Ron,
The whole process
depends on what seeds you are using. Some strains of cannabis mature much
quicker than others.
You should water the plant when the soil has dried
out; generally this is about every 3 - 4 days (a hydrometer is useful for this
purpose). If it is under lights then you should be able to smoke it from
anything between 8 - 16 weeks, depending on the strain of cannabis you are
growing. If you are using sunlight you could be waiting up to 7 - 8 months, so
do yourself a favour and have a look at our good friends at
Starlite
Systems who do wonderful starter kits.
Wishing you every
success.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Hey Doc. I have
a question about first time smokers, why do you not get high the first few
times? More importantly, my actual question is if you smoked a whole lot your
first time could you get high? If you can, then how safe is that? Like, if a
normal pot smoker smoked that much then they'd be out of their mind, so if
someone smokes that much the first time will they too be out of their mind once
they take in enough and it kicks in? I guess the thing that would answer my
question is what happens to the THC when you first smoke and if you smoke
enough the first time for it to effect you will all the THC from the beginning
that wasn't effecting you at first kick in also or is it just what you smoke
once it starts kicking in? I know that's kinda confusing to follow, especially
if you're stoned right now doc, but I just thought I'd ask. One of my friends
wants to smoke and we want to get her high the first time so we plan on tokin'
until she's high and I just wanna make sure she doesn't freak out cuz she'll
have so much in her from before she started feeling it. Well, thanks a lot and
I hope you understood that and have an answer, heh.
Thank you,
Ramblin' in NJ. |
Dear
Ramblin',
Fucking hell you don't
half talk a load of shite! I think you're friend will have no problem getting
stoned if it's making you gibber like that. Please send me
some!
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Hey man, first
off, is solid the same as soap bar? Can smoking dope on its own still give you
cancer? And how come that when you smoke solid on its own you hardly feel
anything?
Also, can you cook with solids? I heard that if you put it in
coffee it really makes you buzz!
Cheers,
Karl. |
Dear
Karl,
To tell the truth, I
barely class soap bar as cannabis, as it has so little in it and the effect is
more like being sedated rather than being stoned. As for solids, there are so
many types of lovely good resins and pollens to be smoked. It is a shame the
big gang importers can only bother with soap bar and smack, but all sorts of
goodies can be found if you have the right attitude. Don't expect to get too
much from Afghanistan anymore, which is a real shame!
Every fucking
thing gives you cancer these days; it's your choice. Respect to Bob Marley and
George Harrison. I'm fucked, I also own a mobile phone and I went to school
underneath electricity pylons.
Yes, of course you can cook with solids,
take a look at some of my past answers and also look out for our cooking with
cannabis feature coming soon on this web site (when we're not so stoned). If
you want to put cannabis in your coffee, use hot milk, melt your pot in the
milk before you add the coffee. Do not boil!
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Recently in our
school drug searches have become a problem. Sniffer dogs have been used several
times and will be used a couple more times I am told. Is there something that I
can do to hide the scent for the dogs or something that I can do to just plain
avoid getting caught?
Thanks,
Bongo. |
Dear
Bongo,
If you can afford
it, a pinch of cocaine on the floor at the entrance to the room where the
sniffer dogs check you should do the trick. Apparently this renders their sense
of smell useless. Alternatively, sprinkle pepper or ground aniseed on yourself
to deter the dogs finding any drugs you have on you.
Drugs such as
ecstasy, speed or LSD are easier to disguise, as let's face it, good bud does
smell even without sniffer dogs.
Or how about actually going to lessons,
knuckling down and doing some proper work so you can have a good career ahead
of you? If this option sounds really boring then I suggest moving to Plymouth
where I've heard you can buy drugs from the some of the teachers.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Firstly might I
say I admire how you help people to participate in the pleasures of drugs. I am
a teenager who has over the last year become very much into dope and I am very
interested into getting into something stronger such as magic mushrooms. I live
in Glasgow and I was wondering if you could advise me on locations or likely
places where shrooms could be found. I understand if this isn't possible due to
the specifications of my question but I thank you for your time either way.
Yours sincerely,
A
Teen Stoner. |
Dear
Teen Stoner,
You're a bit
late for mushroom season, which is a shame, as the Highlands are home to
millions of Liberty Caps. As you live in Glasgow, you should have no problem
finding something stronger than cannabis. However, please refrain from taking
heroin, unless you want to fit in with the local 'smack heads'.
Yuck!
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Hey what's
going on? I wanted to know the steps on how to make the dried banana skins so I
can trip on them? I have them drying and I want to know what to do after they
are done drying? I need you to write me back ASAP!
Thanks,
Vince. |
Dear
Vince,
You wouldn't believe
the amount of questions I now receive regarding the smoking of dried banana
skins from people like you who obviously can't afford more traditional drugs in
order to get high.
Tripping on banana skins can be very dangerous. A
friend of mine did this once and ended up in hospital. If you really do need
more information, please check previous answers on this
site.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I just smoked a
fatass J and I looked in the mirror and realized something. My skin was all
dried out shit. What the fuck is up with that shit? Oh yeah, can you put
shrooms in a doobie and smoke it?
Regards,
Crazy. |
Dear
Crazy,
I advise a healthy
balanced diet with plenty of vitamins, E is particularly good.
Yes you
can smoke shrooms, however, I can tell you from personal experience it is
better to make them into tea or cook them in a meal. Happy tripping. Have you
ever tried LSD?
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Is there any
way to fluff up weed that has been packed very tightly?
Regards,
Sky. |
Dear
Sky,
It sounds to me that you want
to fool people into believing that you have top quality home-grown bud when
really you have compressed Dutch import, so therefore I am going to advise you
put it in the tumble drier down at the local
launderette.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear Dr
Hemp,
I read in a few of your previous responses something about
eating orange peel covered with toothpaste. I am curious about its effects. I'd
like to know how long it lasts, how much you have to eat to trip, the
approximate ratio of toothpaste to orange peel and if I can still act sober in
front of people while on it.
Regards,
Chrono. |
Dear
Chrono,
I recommend a fifty /
fifty ratio of orange peel and toothpaste.
The effects come on instantly
and it's not a good idea to do this in front of your friends unless you want to
end up looking like a right twat.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I've been told
(by an isolated source) that smoking weed is five times more harmful to your
lungs than smoking cigarettes, and is more likely to cause cancer. I smoked
cigarettes for several years and I definitely felt the effects it had on my
lungs. I've smoked weed very heavily for a year and a half and it has not
seriously bothered me at all. Now, there is no excuse good enough to ever make
me quit smoking weed, but I just wanted to know if you knew if this was true or
not? You have the answers to all my smoking needs.
Much obliged,
Xetheia.
P.S. Because of
your positive feedback, I am definitely moving to the UK as soon as
possible. |
Dear
Xetheia,
Let's be quite honest,
cannabis smoke is not good for your lungs, neither is any smoke for that
matter. As an adult, I believe that you have the right to put whatever you like
into your own body. For more information on the dangers of marijuana take a
look at this web page
http://www.ukcia.org/lib/mjmyth1.htm, which will answer
your question in greater detail.
If you are moving to the UK then places
such as Bristol, Bath, Manchester, London, Edinburgh and Newcastle all have a
good night life, but can be a bit seedy. Totnes has no nightclubs, but is home
to an excellent free party scene and the drugs are also really
good.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I have been
smoking banana skins for fifteen years and would like to know when I should
take up smoking 'pot', any suggestions?
Regards,
J. Archer. |
Dear
Jeffery Archer aka Jack Karaoke aka
Trogg,
You should know better than to fool around with dangerous
substances like banana skins and under absolutely no circumstances whatsoever
should you smoke "pot" as it will send you even madder. Why don't you take up
skittles or something else less addictive? However, if you must try smoking
"pot", then may I suggest you try MDMA too and go to some of the wicked local
parties. I've heard DJ Trotski plays some fine slabs of chilled vinyl. Perfect
for the first time toker like you.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Hey, I heard
that moistening my pot and letting some mould grow on it would increase the
potency? Is this true? Would it be harmful to smoke?
Yours,
Elite. |
Dear
Elite,
Who the fuck told you
that? I don't prescribe mouldy pot.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I was wondering
if you could help me out, I need to make a home made bong, a so called "bottle
bag" as they are quite cool and toking on one of these baby's usually results
in me getting quite blocked! Very cool and means I don't have to use as much
ganja. I need to know if there is an alternative to stealing school supplies of
gauze and/or destroying my mother's kitchen utensils!
Cheers,
Lindy. |
Dear
Lindy,
Why don't you save up
your pocket money and buy a proper one from these guys at
www.bongshop.co.uk.
If you still want to make your
own bong, you will need a gauze (or tin foil if your science lab has run out);
a plastic bottle; a small metal tube and a bowl to put the ganja in.
I
can't be bothered to give full instructions; it's really quite
simple.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I've got a big
male plant two weeks into bud I just want to know if I will get any smoke or
seed from it or am I wasting my time and money?
Thanks,
Cory. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
If you don't
mind I'd like to ask you a few questions:
- Do you know of any picking spots for magic mushrooms
in the west of London?
- Do you know of any sites where I can buy marijuana,
or maybe you can?
- Have you ever tried coke and what's it like?
- Where is Totnes and what is so special about it?
Thand for you time.
Yours sincerely,
Max. |
Dear
Max,
Some of the parks, but
if after thousands then you'll be better off going to the countryside, however,
Liberty Caps have all gone this year. Too late mate!
You cannot buy
marijuana online, as this upsets the government and they tell their boot boys
to arrest you and put you in prison. You can buy marijuana seeds, which you can
store for a later date to grow when the government legalises it. We do not
suggest anyone should grow cannabis plants in the UK, as it is
illegal!
Yes I have tried coke once or twice, it is fun, but ultimately
turns you into a wanker.
As for Totnes, the nice thing about the place
is that the drugs are good and easily obtainable. It's known as 'Little
Amsterdam' for a good reason, there are plenty of dealers selling it openly in
the streets trading as if there was no tomorrow. There is also a large cannabis
farm nearby that offers employment to many of the town's toking population. The
local traffic warden (who is so stupid they wouldn't even let him join the
Police) is a big fat cunt, but aren't they all?
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I am very very
pissed off 16 year old at the moment. Last Friday I bought a very very nice
½ ounce of Moroccan black - the type of deal ya only get once in ya life
time and two euros to accompany it. Then my mum (while was out) went through my
bedroom and stole the lot. This has absolutely ruined my Christmas and I just
need some advice on how to get my mum to see that weed and even the odd E isn't
so bad. I do very well at school and I've tried to show her that it even makes
my school work better on occasions. I need help soon cos I am now pretty unable
to get anything near the house and I don't trust my friends to keep it for me
(well I couldnt trust myself in their shoes).
Cheers,
Matt. |
Dear
Matt,
Due to the misinformation
that is put about concerning marijuana it might be difficult to persuade your
mother to return your stash. You can always give it a go.
Would your
mother have confiscated tins of beer if she found them in your room?
The best advice I can offer is to leave home as soon as possible and in
the mean time find a good hiding place in the garden. Why don't you move to
Totnes where the grass is always greener?
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I am a fat kid
and live in the dirty south. I've tried mid-grade and everything from
everywhere but nothing really gets me high. One of my friends said it was
because I was bigger and needed more. I want to know what kind of weed to can
suggest to get me lifted.
Thanks,
Matt. |
Dear
Matt,
If you're not getting
high then you are smoking "low-grade" ganja. Why don't you get your hands on
some proper bud (white widow, k2 to name a few) that will get you thoroughly
wasted. Be warned, this will give you "the munchies" and you may end up twice
the size as you are now. Exercise is also good!
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I go to an
American boarding school with a nasty drug policy and when some seeds were
found in my room, they put me on random urinalysis for the rest of the school
year.
Because the drug testing will be random, I will not know when it
will happen (so those detox remedies wouldn't help much). They can start
testing me soon, only 16 days after I last smoked. Is this enough time to get
it out of my system? Are there any things I can do to ensure that it gets out
of my system? (I heard cranberry juice is good, any others?)
Thanks,
Unfortunate American
Student. |
Dear
Matt,
It sounds like you go to
a really shit boarding school that will make your school years a real drag. Do
your parents hate you that much?
My advice is to take advantage of your
school's drug testing policy and get really wasted on drugs such as coke, LSD
and marijuana as often as possible. This will hopefully result in getting
expelled from this awful Colditz like boarding school hell that your parents
are punishing you with. May I also recommend large quantities of alcohol,
swearing at the teachers and shitting on your principal's car. Don't forget to
share your drugs and alcohol with all your friends and the younger students
too.
If this doesn't work and they decide to give you a second chance;
then try getting the principal's daughter pregnant.
Hope this helps and
remember don't let the bastards grind you down.
Regards,
Dr Hemp.
P.S. Be careful
with the LSD, it can be quite strong. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Greetings from
Colombia, even we read your monthly advices, is there any danger on overdosing
from eating oranges with toothpaste? Is the high effect the same one as if you
smoked some pot?
Thank you,
Luis. |
Dear
Luis,
As you're from
Columbia, I'm sure that you're sick to death of all that cheap high quality
cocaine and marijuana and therefore decided to progress to European style drugs
such as orange peel and toothpaste.
It is not the same as the high from
smoking marijuana and I doubt it would be humanly possible to overdose on this.
I tried lemon peel and toothpaste the other day, as I'd run out of oranges. I
did not get high and I came to the conclusion orange peel is better, if you can
believe that.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I go to a
convention every year in Las Vegas. I fly from NY so the flight is domestic.
For 9 years running I have just rapped my weed in a few plastic bags and
carried it on my person. That has always worked fine. Now with all the crazy
terrorist action I am concerned that a small but bulging item in my pant's
pocket will make security empty my pockets. Do you have any suggestions or
experiences? Travelling with one's personal stash on a domestic flight?
Thank you,
Jason. |
Dear
Jason,
Unlike the USA, domestic
flights are almost unheard of in the UK, so I'm probably not the best person to
ask.
Because of recent events, airport security has obviously been
tightened, which is good news for those of us who don't want to be blown up.
The down side to this is that it is now more difficult to transport narcotics.
You may still take the chance and get away with it, just don't carry too much
and certainly don't carry any cocaine, as they might get a bit jumpy about
white powder. I also understand the drug laws in Nevada are very strict.
I recently heard on BBC News 24 that a large quantity of cannabis was
seized by UK customs in England, as a direct result of increased airport
security following the dreadful events of September 11th, which is a
bummer. I think more people will have to start growing their
own.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
|
