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Ask Dr Hemp
Drugs Information &
advice
Past archives April 2002.
Scroll down the page to read past questions sent to our
pot expert, Dr Hemp. Remember if you have a hemp or drugs related question
- you can e-mail Dr Hemp at [email protected].
Also, for love and sex advice you can ask the Caned In
Totnes sex agony aunt - Dr Hump. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Is it possible
or easy to grow the outdoor breeds from "The Sensi Seed Company" or is the UK
weather not good enough? Also, are most of these seed banks online
reliable?
Thanks,
Ken. |
Dear
Ken,
Yes it is possible
to grow outside in the UK, in fact there are tens of thousands of people who do
every year and I therefore urge you all to get planting.
If you are
going to plant outside in the UK, you really should think about planting them
now or by the end of May (preferably before). A good tip is to germinate them
indoors before you plant them outside, though this is not essential.
Find a good sunny outdoor spot, which will not draw any unwanted attention and
ideally near a convenient water supply. I am lucky enough to live in beautiful
Devon where there are thousands of secret locations where this is done. Soon
our government will be forced to listen to majority opinion in the UK and
legalise cannabis so you can openly grow the plant. Who knows, you may even win
first prize at the local garden show.
The seeds from the Sensi Seed Bank
are absolutely fine, though they are very expensive, as you are paying for the
name. Despite what Sensi say, they are not the only producer of F1 seeds and
you can get equally good results from other seed producers who don't charge
such extortionate prices.
A particular favourite of mine are K.C.
Brains who won the Dutch Weed Cup in 2001 with their Haze special. So if you
are planning to grow a lot of cannabis (either outdoors or indoors) then why
not save yourself some money and buy your F1 seeds from
www.potseeds.co.uk instead of Sensi
Seeds.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp.
P.S. If you want to win some F1 cannabis seeds, then check out
the competition on the home page of this web
site |
[DISCLAIMER: The above ad
is intended only for people who live in sensible countries like Holland,
Switzerland or Belgium where it would not be illegal to grow
marijuana.] |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I got me a real
problem here. At my last stoning session, three of my mates pulled whities
after a mere 12 j's and 3 bongs, the rest paled out after a further lung and a
'shroom tea bong. I was just starting to buzz at this time, so I had to finish
off the session with an A4-sized resin spliff to myself. How the hell can I
increase my mates' capacity for da green?
Please help.
Yours,
Uge
Tonker.
P.S. Anyone want some prime Orange Skunk? |
Dear
Uge Tonker,
What the fuck is
wrong with your mates? You are not the first person to bring to my attention
the problem of lightweight kids who are unable to smoke cannabis properly
without turning green.
I blame the parents, teachers and our
politicians for failing to provide leadership on this important
issue.
For thousands of years our elders have shown us the way and it's
only in modern times that drugs have been made illegal.
Tony Blair was
in a rock band while at university in the 1960s and says he never took drugs.
What is wrong with the man? It's hardly surprising with leadership qualities
like that; all your mates are such wooses who can't handle their drugs
properly. At least George Bush was a cokehead and alcoholic in his younger
days, though having said that, I don't trust him either.
Get your mates
some amphetamines (speed, ecstasy, etc.,) which should increase their capacity
to smoke and drink more without pulling a whitie.
If they still
continue to be lightweights then at least there will be more drugs left for you
to consume; perhaps you need to find some more hardcore
mates?
Regards,
Dr
Hemp.
P.S. Yes, I'd love some primo orange bud, please e-mail me an
ounce or two! |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I am selling
really shitty weed. Is there any way I can make this shitty weed look really
good?
Regards,
Harpness. |
Dear
Harpness,
I think you are a
bit of a cunt for selling shitty weed in the first place and even more of a
cunt for asking me how to make it look good so you can fob it off onto some
unsuspecting mug.
Throw away your shitty weed and get some proper
cannabis. It's wankers like you that give cannabis users a bad name. I hope you
get busted and a decent dealer takes your place.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Have you tried
Datura?
I have. I did about 12 pods boiled down in water. The shit
grows wild in Arizona. I am lucky to be alive. I was in hospital ICU and
restrained for 3 days. I even have scars (10 years later) from the restraints
on ankles and wrist.
But man oh man, I had some interesting visions and
I have never felt the same since. I was just wondering if you have ever tried
Datura?
Regards,
Mike. |
Dear
Mike,
No, I've
never tried Datura (Jimson Weed, Devil's Weed) and I'm not sure if I am brave
enough to try it.
I know people who have taken Datura (it grows in the
wild here in Devon too) and I've heard varying opinions on its effects and
outcome; most of them like you said they never felt the same again. I think
it's bizarre how this incredibly dangerous hallucinogen is completely legal,
while soft drugs like marijuana remain prohibited in much of the
world.
There is a story of a poor guy who consumed some datura that was
growing outside the offices of
Torbay Borough Council
and subsequently jumped to their death from a multi-story car park in Paignton.
If anyone is searching for more information on this hallucinogenic
plant then I suggest looking on the
Erowid Datura Vault where there is quite a lot of
information, which should probably put people off trying it.
Datura has
been used for thousands of years and despite what I've said, I have friends who
claim to have enjoyed it. It's certainly not a toy and to be honest, I don't
think I'll ever do it, yet you never know?
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Any chance upon
us getting married? I've always had a thing for cannabis smoking
brits.
Yours,
Ashley (USA). |
Dear
Ashley,
I'm not sure. How
rich are you? Please send a photograph and personal
C.V.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Please help.
I've just inherited 4 small seedlings. As beautiful as they may be, it appears
that they are contaminated with tiny bugs (spit bugs) and some leaf tips are
wilted and brown. These plants where grown outdoors but we moved them inside.
They are only about 2 - 3 inches tall. What should I do?
Yours
sincerely,
Glenn. |
Dear
Glenn,
Neem oil is probably
the best way to get rid of your bugs. Neem is a botanical insecticide from a
tree native to the Middle East. It is 100% organic and completely safe as it is
non-toxic to humans and animals.
For more information, visit
www.starlitesystems.co.uk/pest_control/
Another
method is to use a very mild solution of soapy water, yet if they are
contaminated with lots of tiny bugs, I think Neem is your best
bet.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Can you be
prosecuted if you fail a drug test in the US?
Thanks,
Patrick. |
Dear
Patrick,
In the UK, where I
live, you cannot be prosecuted for any drugs that are found to be in your
system; for example if the Police caught you with a few ecstasy pills, they
could prosecute you for possession of a class A drug, however, if you managed
to neck your sweeties before the police could get their hands on them, they
would be powerless to do anything other than watch you get loved up after
multi-dropping your happy beans (not to be done if you have a bag full). They
can still arrest you if you have not managed to eat all your weed (have you
ever tried eating neat bud? It's almost impossible), but that's another story
and soon they won't even be able to do that in the UK.
I do not know for
certain what the situation is in the USA, as I am English, yet I should imagine
it is probably similar to the UK.
However, if you are under orders from
the courts not to do drugs and then fail a drug test you could get into
trouble, so this is when our very good friends at
Test Clear come in most
handy.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
 |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I have heard
about this plant called salvia divinorum and its hallucinogenic effects, I've
just got in touch with some one that can get me some but the only thing is I
don't have a pipe or a bong? Only have Rizlas so I wonder if you can help me
out and tell me how to roll it in Rizla, pure or with tobacco?
Yours
sincerely,
Ravi. |
Dear
Ravi,
Salvia divinorum is a
plant that can be used for its psychoactive effects. It is a unique high that
produces different levels of intoxication, depending on how much is
consumed.
You will have to get your hands on a pipe or bong, as salvia
should be smoked hot (hotter than tobacco is) in order for salvinorin to be
vaporized. Hold the smoke in your lungs for 20 -30 seconds before exhaling;
otherwise much of the smoke will be wasted.
Salvia is legal in all
countries except Australia, if anybody is interested in buying some salvia then
a good source is www.potseeds.co.uk/salvia/.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Firstly may I
compliment you on a fantastic site with loads of useful info for growers in the
UK, keep up the good work!
I have been a very regular user of the
weed/hash for about 11 years now and plan to keep on smoking for eternity,
however my question is not drugs related. My lovely lady and I were in Salcombe
last year and also Plymouth and we fell in love with it from the start. We very
nearly moved to Plymouth in September as London is wearing me out, I'm 27,
Scottish (Isle of Islay) and lived in London for 5 years. My girlfriend and I
have had enough, all we want to do is smoke, party and relax on a beach, not
get run over, pushed and cussed by money mad freaks who constantly do 200 miles
an hour, in and out of the car!
What is the housing situation like in
Totnes or the surrounding areas? Are there any jobs in the area for a young man
like me?
I know this isn't your average request for info but I have
faith in you!
Peace and light,
Matt. |
Dear
Matt,
Thank you for
compliments, I'm glad this web site is putting Totnes on the map for something
positive.
If you want to get away from that 200 mph London lifestyle
then Devon might well be the place for you, as long as you are aware it only
moves at 2 mph down here.
Salcombe is a most beautiful place, though
sadly full of Tories and retired military types. Plymouth is more urban, yet it
has a very vibrant nightlife and there are some lovely characters to be found.
I know a lot of Americans visit this site, so they should find Plymouth a very
interesting city, as it is where many of the first American settlers originated
(apologies to the American Indians).
House prices in Devon are as high
as I am most of the time; sadly this is due to rich people largely from London
buying holiday homes, which they use for about 2 weeks of the year. Rented
accommodation is available in Totnes, but good places are hard to find and
usually get taken on very quickly.
The job situation in Devon is not
good either, with many employers paying minimum wage. However, due to the huge
demand for good quality drugs in this area, there is always room for drug
dealers and growers. Apparently, if you do this, it's possible to have a very
comfortable lifestyle and have all the time in the world to laze about on the
beach or even go for a picnic up on Dartmoor.
The best nightlife in
Devon is to be found in Plymouth or Exeter; there are clubs in Torquay, but you
might find them a bit cheesy. Dartmouth Regatta is always a good laugh too,
especially if you're high on hallucinogenic drugs (they do a great firework
display).
In addition to the clubbing scene, there is a thriving
outdoor free party scene here in the South West of England and it has to be
said there are some extremely good drugs on offer if you know the right people.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I would like to know if there is THC in the
plant catnip?
Regards,
Cron. |
Dear
Cron,
No, there is no THC in the
plant catnip. Gee, some of our readers are thick as shit and of course you win
some soap-bar from Torquay, which won't contain a great deal more THC than your
catnip.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
Is it true that if you smoke hemp you'll trip?
Regards,
Tony. |
Dear
Tony,
Depends if you smoke
industrial hemp or primo bud, you fool. Some people will smoke anything, even
catnip it would seem.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
My name is
Andrea Schilder and I am currently doing research on ecstasy as part of my
honours thesis in psychology at University of New England, Australia. I am
basically looking at the long-term effects of ecstasy use in terms of mood and
impulsivity. It would be great if I could post a link to your site.
Participants will only have to complete an online questionnaire anonymously and
I am looking for participants from any country who either have or haven't used
ecstasy. The study has been approved by my university ethics committee and
neither condones or discourages drug use. Please contact me
[email protected] with your
reply.
Thanks heaps,
Andrea. |
Dear
Andrea,
Having consumed a
fair amount of ecstasy over the previous decade I feel qualified to answer your
question.
I personally have not experienced bad mood swings from MDMA,
it's only ever made me feel good. I've also noticed the high quality MDMA
rather than cheap pills seem to have the least ill side-effects.
There
was an interesting article recently in
New
Scientist that suggested there was no evidence to suggest MDMA produces
irreversible brain damage. It also said other legally prescribed
antidepressants such as Valium, Prozac, etc., worked in similar ways to MDMA
and millions of people take these every day.
In fact, such reports are
nothing new, though they are usually suppressed or refused funding if they do
not sing the same tune as the American or British Governments.
I hope
other ecstasy users reading this site take part in your survey; feel free to
e-mail me a copy. Also, if you encounter any decent clean MDMA in your studies,
please e-mail it to [email protected] (for
research purposes of course, I am the Dr ya know).
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear Dr
Hemp,
I was wondering if you had any advice on how to bring skunk
back from Amsterdam I have been told that if I seal it in a plastic bag and put
the bag in a pot of hair gel I am safe from the noses of annoying fucking
sniffer dogs. Any advice?
Regards,
Henath Maginti. |
Dear
Henath Maginti,
If you're
only bringing back a personal amount then perhaps you should waltz though
customs as if it were legal anyway and if you get stopped, tell them you heard
marijuana had recently been legalised in Britain too.
If you must be
more cautious then I suggest returning to the UK via any place other than
Holland. France is a good route I hear. Beware of using items that dogs are
repelled by as their handlers are trained to recognize signs of this from the
animals. One of the best ways of smuggling into the country is in your petrol
tank (with your ganja thrice wrapped of course, use plastic cola bottles so it
floats on the top and their optical cameras can't see it). Another way to do it
(and this is something that Customs hates) is in coffee, it is impossible for a
dog to smell anything through coffee.
You could always bring back some
F1 cannabis seeds (which are legal in Britain) and grow lots of cannabis in the
UK anyway. Fuck the law, coz it's crap.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I'm rather
partial to a bit of Bob Dylan when having a lonely smoke. Which musical artists
would you recommend for pot heads?
Also, I'm a bit of a film buff with
my favorite film now being Fallen with Denzal Washington as he battles against
a demon called Azazel ,winning the fight by having a smoke at the end of the
film and stopping the demon possessing his soul (this film is HIGHLY
recommended smokers). Are you aware of any particularly good films in your area
of expertise?
Yours sincerely,
Ben. |
Dear
Ben,
Earlier Bob
Dylan is fine on occasion, however, since I discovered ecstasy, my Bob Dylan
CD's are rarely played (a bit like my guitar these days).
I like dance
music, such as, house, drum & bass, some hip hop and trip hop, etc., I'm
even partial to some classical music at times (try out Ravel).
Music
that should be avoided by recreational drug users at all costs include Cliff
Richard, Craig David, Usher, Victoria Beckham and anything associated with Pop
Idol.
I like films too. I recently saw Lord Of The Rings, which I
thought was excellent. Favourite films are of course Fear and Loathing In Los
Vegas and Saving Grace
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I live in the
shit town of Buckfastleigh as I am sure you know about and I want to grow some
weed. I think I have conned my parents into thinking I am going to grow some
look alike weed (the stuff they make clothes out of) but I am very skint for
money, do you think I could grow some for under £20. Do you know if I
could use standard strip lights or cheap halogens?
Please could you
help.
Thanks for your time,
Ben. |
Dear
Ben,
Well done for conning
your parents into thinking you are going into the hemp fabric industry. Either
you have the gift of the gab or you have incredibly stupid
parents.
Ideally, if you want to grow good quality cannabis, you'll need
to purchase some indoor gardening equipment. Why don't you take a trip to
Plymouth and visit the shop of
Starlite
Systems who should be able to sort you out the best equipment you need to
grow indoors. It is possible to set up a basic indoor grow room for around
£120, however, the more you spend, the better the returns will be.
If you are unable to make this initial investment then I suggest buying
some outdoor seeds. It's not too late to plant them and as you live in
Buckfastleigh, I know there are plenty of discreet places where you could grow
a few cannabis plants. If you plant some outdoors seeds now, they should be
ready in late September/ early October and hopefully you'll be able to make
enough money to buy some indoor gardening equipment to keep you going through
the winter.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear Dr
Hemp,
Wicked site mate, I just wanted to ask you a few questions
about your boot gunk recipe.
If I had say 5 banana skins how much wine and nutmeg should I use? I
heard that nutmeg is very strong if you use too much.
Do you chop up the
banana skin into fine dust or little bits? I'm guessing that you don't need the
Worcester Sauce if you're preparing it to smoke. True?
And a couple of
other things.
I'm living in Malta at the minute (I've had to make do
with hash for the last 6 months, I'm dying for some bud!) but am moving back to
England in June do you know of any decent outdoor raves this summer time in the
south?
Finally, do you know any other ideas for things I can get high
off in my mum's kitchen? (I'm bored and skint until I
move back).
By the way not all us younger generation are complete
lightweights like some of the kids that have been sending you messages saying
that they're still high a week after having a smoke and shit like
that.
Take it easy mate,
Andrew. |
Dear
Andrew,
It's pleasing to know
that not all the younger generation are lightweights and you are into hardcore
drugs such as Sailor's Banana Boot Gunk.
The Worcester Sauce is not
essential, yet I find it enhances the flavour, Tabasco Sauce may also be used.
5 Bananas, half a bottle of rice wine (you can drink the rest) and a few grams
of nutmeg should do the trick. Did you know you could get very wasted by eating
nutmeg alone, if you can keep it down?
There are plenty of legal highs
out there, though be warned, some hallucinogenic plants, such as Datura, are
also poisonous. If you're looking for something from your mum's kitchen then
may I suggest snorting nutmeg and orange peel zest. I've also heard inserting a
raw garlic up your anus can make you trip; I've never tried this, please let me
know if it works.
I'm sure there will be plenty of decent outdoor raves
in England this summer, if you find out about any, please let me know. Maybe
you'll be able to buy some proper drugs at one of these events.
Regards,
Dr
Hemp. |
Dear Dr
Hemp,
I love the site.
I have one question. I live in a
college dorm and just got this great bong.
The problem is that my RA
isn't cool with smoking and I've already been busted. Any suggestions as to how
I can smoke out of my bong and hide the smell?
Thanks,
Sienna.
P.S. I've already tried
spoofs, opening the window, and putting a towel under the door. |
Dear Sienna,
Here are 10 options
for you:
- Smoke salvia divinorum in your bong instead, as this
is legal and he may tire of busting you if this is all he finds in your room.
Salvia will get you more wasted than cannabis anyway.
- Spike his drink with LSD and laxatives (just for
fun), he'll either go nuts, shit himself and get the sack or become more
understanding in future.
- Find out his phone number and print it on rent boy
cards and distribute them in local phone boxes and public toilets (just for
fun).
- Threaten him with physical violence, blow some smoke
in his face and tell the knob-end to fuck off and die! (My preferred
option.)
- Buy some joss sticks and leave the windows
open.
- Smoke soap-bar and argue with your RA that there is
hardly any cannabis in it anyway.
- Spread a nasty rumour about him and young boys, easy
to do and everyone loves campus gossip.
- Spread a nasty rumour about his heroin addiction,
easy to do and everyone loves campus gossip.
- Plant some heroin and some child porn on him a few
weeks after the rumours have spread and call the police.
- Eat him.
I hope these suggestions help you get this interfering
twat off your case.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I have never
done weed and I am 15. My whole family has been addicted to it. I have been
offered to buy some and smoke it but have never done so. I feel I am now ready
to buy some. How do I know if I am getting ripped off?? And how much is a dime?
What do I do with it after I get it? (I know smoke it, but how?)
Thanx,
Kelly. |
Dear
Kelly,
I get many letters from
15 year olds who don't know how to smoke weed properly. I remember what it was
like at your age, trying to look cool and all that stuff, but why don't you
just ask your parents, they sound like a right bunch of groovers.
Remember, don't be embarrassed to discuss your drug habit with your
folks, if they are good parents, they'll teach you the correct way to be a
waster. Ask them if they can get some ketamine for you and a few friends, just
for a laugh.
You know you're being ripped off when you get so desperate
as to buy some soap-bar off a scouser in a Torquay pub. Get your older brothers
and sisters to introduce you to their dealers and maybe even start dealing
yourself. Who wants a normal job anyway?
Regards,
Dr Hemp.
P.S. I've no idea
how much a dime is stupid; I live in England and have very little cents! |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I cannot
believe you have this type of web site out there for kids, this is absurd and
to help junkies pass a drug test! I better not ever catch an email on my system
again from you or any other member you are associated with.
A concerned
parent with enough problems dealing with child and I don't need this crap!
Myerswp.
Dr Hemp
wrote:
> Read some of the past answers on my site and you will find
lots of information
> on how to cheat a drug test.
>
> For
products, I particularly recommend
Test Clear.
>
>
Regards,
>
> Dr Hemp.
> ----- Original Message
-----
> From: "myerswp" <[email protected]>
>
To: <[email protected]>
>
Sent: Wednesday, April 10, 2002 1:26 AM
> Subject: (no subject)
>
> dear dc hemp
> >
> > yo man im not sure when my drug
test is but I need some quick advice on
> > how to get it out of my
system with house hold products ight
> >
> > keep it real
,
> > dcskaten |
Dear
Over Concerned
Parent,
First of all, if you do not wish to receive e-mails from me,
I strongly suggest you do not send me e-mails from the address
[email protected]. If this is your e-mail address
and someone else has used it without your permission then I advise you set-up a
password on your system so nobody else can read or access your e-mail. This is
not hard to do.
Furthermore, my web site is for recreational drug users
of all ages. I should also like to add there is a big difference between a
marijuana user and a junkie. Alcohol and tobacco are more dangerous than THC,
yet would you class users of the aforementioned substances as junkies?
I
believe a person should be judged on their ability and not their lifestyle,
therefore I make no apology whatsoever for helping recreational drug users to
pass a drug test, after all, these tests are easy to fool and I hope the
original sender of this e-mail correspondence succeeds in doing
so.
Perhaps if you did a bit of research on recreational drugs yourself,
you wouldn't have so many problems in dealing with your child? Feel free to
further read my site for more education, good luck!
With regards to
e-mails from [email protected] on your
system, you shall not receive any further correspondence from me, unless you
specifically reply to this e-mail. However, I intend to publish the e-mail you
sent on my web site when I next update the letters page, so you may receive
further correspondence from some readers of my site.
Regards,
Dr Hemp.
P.S. To all my
letter writers, please state if you do not wish your e-mail to be published on
this site and remember requests for removal are always honoured if you ask
nicely. Furthermore, can kids please not use their parents' e-mail and set
up a Hotmail account instead,
as I don't really appreciate e-mails from irate battleaxes in America; this is
not the first time this has happened. |
Dear
Dr Hemp,
I am an old
hippie that grew up on mushrooms in the 70's. Cool! Now my 15 year old wants to
try them, but I am having a hard time finding a photo of what the right ones
look like. Do you have any pics of shrooms from the area I am in? Florida, USA.
Thank and peace,
Cindy. |
Dear
Cindy,
I am not the best person
to ask about magic mushrooms in the USA as I live in England and I've never
been to the USA in my life (though I do want to go to the Burning Man Festival
in Nevada, as this sounds like a real hoot).
There are some
shroom pics on the magic mushroom
pages on this site and of course a search on
Google should find you plenty
of information.
I think you are a cool mother and a responsible parent
for making sure your son/daughter does not poison (her)himself. Most teenagers
would probably try magic mushrooms regardless of what their parents think, so I
believe your honest relationship with your teenager means (s)he probably won't
do anything stupid behind your back.
Has (s)he got a birthday coming up
soon? Perhaps you should buy your teenager some cannabis seeds (and maybe even
some hydro equipment) so (s)he can set up his/her own grow-room and learn about
plants and nutrients along the way. I think some of the other correspondents on
this page could learn a thing or two from you.
Regards,
Dr Hemp. |
|
